If you want to know how to pick up a woman without being nervous or shy, just get started by reading step 1.
We all know, whether firsthand or through acquaintances, that online dating can be a horror show.
You must be 18 years or older to read these pick ups! How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized? Your parents must be retarded, because you are special.3.
You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.5.
I can sense that you're a terrific lover, and it intimidates me a little.10. I'll play with your knobs while you watch my antenna rise.12. The silver lining: Horrifying messages are ideal material for war stories, and depressing or entertaining websites and articles that feature egregious digital overtures abound.A select few first messages in this mess, however, lead to IRL relationships. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.20. Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock! My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. Are you a fruit, because Honeydew you know how fine you look right now? Do you live in a corn field, cause I'm stalking you.